GIVE continued...

 

I love this picture! First of all, its from a Whole Foods store, which is my fave place to shop for [expensive] organic goods. Second of all, its Toms Shoes, I mean really, how awesome are they? Third of all, its creative and eye catching. I really would love for that to be at every Whole Foods store, just so I could stare at it. Oh, and fourth of all its the word "Give" and well we all know how I feel about that (previous blog). 

P.S. This was not captured by me, but is on Toms Shoes blog. Check it out!

Heaven on Earth

Recently, I have really been inspired by the word "give". Since I have began a new job, I have tried to think of ways that I can impact those around me financially. The first thing I thought of when I received my first check was tithing. To those of you who may not understand or recognize the concept of tithing, I am right there with you. Conceptually, the idea works, and practically the idea works, but theologically I have always had trouble. I think that it comes from a place in me that doesn't like to be told what to do, especially with my money, and those of you would probably agree. Tithing is the sum of what you make and taking ten percent and giving it to God or the church, or however you like to say it. Mind you, I have done it before. I have taken ten percent of my total earnings and scribbled the amount on a blank check. Complete with my signature I would toss it into the collection basket, and I will not hide that I had a sense of pride that day. Wow, I thought, I have done what I was supposed to do, and it feels good. Good as it felt, that wasn't the entire synopsis.

I have gone through my childhood asking my parents for money to put into the offering. Then as a teenager when I worked, I would sporadically feel convicted to give. Now as a young adult, with a steady income, I now understand more of this command. I now understand that it wasn't about giving to a building, or a pastor, or their staff. It wasn't about money magically floating up to heaven somehow, and it wasn't about feeling good about myself. Recently, I have been giving to missions. I have written checks, scribbled amounts, complete with signature I place it into their basket. These are real people on real missions. This isn't a "specify where you would like your money to go" box. These are dear and real people to me. They have journeys that I want to be a part of. It's not that I don't agree with giving to the church specifically, and if that is what you choose, the blessing is the same. I choose to give to people; I choose to give to those who are less fortunate than I. People with outstretched arms, open ears, and open hearts, who are being equipped to give to others.

The basket is different for me now...To me giving is like a bit of heaven on earth. A place to join, commune, and worship in thanks for what God has given me.

What Would Jesus Do? on Facebook?

My concept of Jesus, religion, and prayer have really been strengthened since I have encountered those who do not believe what I do, or see the world as I do on blogs, etc. I think that technology has enabled people to speak their hearts and their minds more openly than they used. I don't know how Jesus would feel about skypeing one of his parables, but I feel that even technology can be used in a way that many find unimaginable. Its a way to express, debate, research. I have seen myself in these "non-believers" words. I have seen the hypocrisy and I have certainly lived it. I know that I haven't done my best to live the gospel out of pure laziness, complacency, and probably countless more excuses. It pains me to know that I have intersected at the road of life with these people and have no impact on their course, or shown them the One who does. Jesus has transformed my walk and influenced every step. Since I was 6 years old I have known no different. I try to imagine myself if I had known different. If had grown up as a child or teenager without ever setting foot in a church. I close my eyes tightly and drift off into an alternative outcome. It doesn't look hopeful.

The truth is I am blessed to have walked where I have. Every footstep towards the church has caused me to step toward something better for me. Now that I am older I don't simply walk towards a church, as if that was all I needed. Now I walk towards love, mercy, grace, the God I have come to known. The love I have come to painstakingly endure. What kind of love is there without pain? Even the love of Jesus was painful; even the sacrifice came at a price, but for me it was at the cost of my alternative outcome, the cost of my dire soul.

I have recently been drawn to the book Unchristian. I really want to read it just to get a picture of what the world has seen of me, of all Christians. The world can persecute me, but I can also take a deeper glimpse into the the world that so desperately needs salvation.

Identity

You can tell a lot about a person when you read their blog. If I didn't know the people that wrote them I would probably come up with a picture in my head of what they would be like. Every post I read expresses something of importance for that person; whether it be a goal, life event(s), or some off-beat humor. Every person is showing who they are, what they deem essential to life, or what they are experiencing. I realized that my blog pretty much goes all over the map, and so does my personality.

When I look back on my blog I do find inconsistencies. Some of that stuff just wasn't me, but for some reason I wanted it to be. I wanted to be the best version of myself, but all in all I am only one version. There is a secret side to everyone, and everyone has their struggles and battles, and for me, its being content with who I am. In my life I transcend through who I want to mold myself after. There are qualities that I find, that I don't have, but so desperately want to. I do want to be someone who cares for others, sacrifices, and is selfless. I do want to manage my life simply and be someone who makes a difference in others, and impacts the world, big or small.

But what I do have to realize is that my goals are fleeting, my motivations change, and sometimes my intentions waiver under the pressures of...life. Who I am, and where I am is so different from when I started this blog. I am no longer a college student, no longer internally confused and bewildered with life, and more hopeful about the future. My faith is strengthened and the person I thought I was going to be has faded. I am who I am, whether I like it or not. I can no longer try to be something, or someone I am not. My passions are unique, my views are unique, and there's nothing anyone can do to change that.

So from now on, my blog is about what is important to me and who I am. A blog is a blog and that's how it should be.

My Second Pair

I just got my second pair of TOMS! I was so excited when they came, I immediately placed them on my feet. I love them, its like walking on air. If you haven't checked out Toms Shoes before, you should start. For every pair you purchase, one pair will go to a child in need. It's the best money I have spent, well this week...

New Year's Revolution

There is an age old tradition that involves people setting and making out their new year's resolution lists, and having a hard time sticking to them. People who do write out these resolutions, whether on paper or in their head, tend to fail, forget, or forego their chance to make a difference in their lives. What about other's people's lives? What about the lives that need to be changed that aren't on your list?

I think its safe to say, that if/ when I make a new year's resolution list, it will be for the benefit of others, not myself.

Bridges

One thing that is always true to me is that life is a series of bridges. They are remarkable structures that are suspended sometimes hundreds of feet in the air. They require thought, engineering, patience, and a little bit of risk. There's risk involved when crossing a bridge. Who's to say that it won't collapse? Who's to say it won't sway and break under the pressure of the weight or the whipping of the wind?

Yes, life is a lot like a series of bridges. My bridge is now from college to the world outside of my bubble. Outside from the comforts of what I have always known. My bridge is from one place of comfort to the unknown. At times I feel alone on this bridge. I want to look down, I want to freak out, I want to run back to where I came from. But somehow, I have to keep moving. I have to keep walking to the other side. Some bridges are short over small creeks or rivers, others are large and over entire oceans. To me, we all walk this bridge. The long bridge where the end is hard to see. There may be fog, doubt, fear.

You know that saying, "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it"...Well that bridge is now. I have come to it, and I must cross. This is a very long metaphor, but there are times when metaphors are all I have. To others, life is a path, or an ocean, or a mountain, but to me it is a series of bridges.